The road to hell is paved with good intentions...

Ever had someone come to you with an idea, a thought, advise, meaning well but then it ends up doing more harm than good?
And then you're left there, holding your tongue (biting into it with every last ounce of power you have, more likely), trying not to let all the venom flow out so they won't get hurt.
Later your curled into a ball, bleeding (metaphorically or not), and you're wondering that if only you would have let it all out you may have been relieved, something might have released and cleared, if not everything, at least some of the air. Even if it won't clear anything up, why must you suffer to protect them? They didn't have the courtesy to protect you, or they thought whatever needs to be said transcends your pain. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. Why can't you be like them?

Well, this is a start...

After many moons of letting my mind run free with thoughts, and stories, and other bits of unnecessary jumble, I've decided to put them to paper (or keyboard, as is the truth). To whom am I writing? No one, everyone, me.  I don't know who will end up reading this blog, and I don't really care, I just need to let things out and this is my platform. I will not, can not, publish this to my friends, as this is an alias, a name I've chosen to keep some thoughts from them. Why? Well, there's going to be a post that will explain it. If they'd end up reading this, I don't mind; for the chances of them making the connection is slim, and if they do make the connection, well, it is going to solve the problem of me being unable to talk with them.

I don't know how long I can keep it up: I have a tendency to start things with a flare and letting them die down just as quickly. Maybe the lack of pressure will free me, i.e. there's no one to please, at the moment. Maybe I'm on a change course. And maybe it will end up the same as before. I don't know.

What I do know is that I love to write. And this here, this is my place.

So, so long for now, hope I'll see you later.